Sounds silly, but it is true. Now I won’t hold back in my endeavors because I know that it will not feel as intimate and “important” as the moment I am doing the work.

I remembered I was applying for this job at a top company for a senior position. I sat in front of my computer numb every time my fingers laid on the keyboard.

I wrote and re-wrote my cover letter and resume fearing the rejection, thinking to myself, why do I think I have a chance, the job descriptions sound out of my reach.

But I knew I had to try or I will regret it.

I spent many hours in the sunny weekend agonizing and writing. I felt great relief when it was finally done and felt a little unnerving again as I could only wait while my application went through the recruitment system, without any contacts I can follow up on.

Then after 2 months, I suddenly received an email from the company saying that they have given my application proper consideration but I didn’t make the cut.

I actually needed some time to go “oh, THAT post that I applied for!”. Life just moved on without even me realizing it.

Looking back, I felt so intense then, and now, only 2 months later, it’s no big deal. I will remind myself of this when I work on my next projects to give my all with as minimal emotional baggage as possible.